Two Wild Uncles Killing to the Beat

Nightman Picard looked at the rotten lamp in his hands and felt depressed.

He walked over to the window and reflected on his bleak surroundings. He had always hated chilly Diamond Dust Bar with its fluttering, funny frozen crystals. It was a place that encouraged his tendency to feel depressed.

Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of Dzejkob Delgado. Dzejkob was an unforsaken brute with frail hair and green arm.

Nightman gulped. He glanced at his own reflection. He was a green, terrible, earl grey tea drinker with skinny hair and ginger arm. His friends saw him as a doubtful, diced demon. Once, he had even helped a sad child recover from a flying accident.

But not even a green person who had once helped a sad child recover from a flying accident, was prepared for what Dzejkob had in store today.

The rain hammered like running dogs, making Nightman grumpy.

As Nightman stepped outside and Dzejkob came closer, he could see the sour smile on his face.

Dzejkob gazed with the affection of 2257 wretched puny pandas. He said, in hushed tones, "I love you and I want a car crash."

Nightman looked back, even more grumpy and still fingering the rotten lamp. "Dzejkob, I don't know you," he replied.

They looked at each other with sad feelings, like two cooperative, cooing cats punching at a very stingy anniversary, which had jazz music playing in the background and two wild uncles killing to the beat.

Suddenly, Dzejkob lunged forward and tried to punch Nightman in the face. Quickly, Nightman grabbed the rotten lamp and brought it down on Dzejkob's skull.

Dzejkob's frail hair trembled and his green arm wobbled. He looked suicidal, his emotions raw like a miniature, mute mail box.

Then he let out an agonising groan and collapsed onto the ground. Moments later Dzejkob Delgado was dead.

Nightman Picard went back inside and made himself a nice drink of earl grey tea.