Sally Superhalk and the Five Spotted Goldfishes

Once upon a time there was a predatory girl called Sally Superhalk. She was on the way to see her Clarke Williams, when she decided to take a short cut through Snotchester Forest.

It wasn't long before Sally got lost. She looked around, but all she could see were trees. Nervously, she felt into her bag for her favourite toy, Little Mouse, but Little Mouse was nowhere to be found! Sally began to panic. She felt sure she had packed Little Mouse. To make matters worse, she was starting to feel hungry.

Unexpectedly, she saw a spotted goldfish dressed in a purple jumper disappearing into the trees.

"How odd!" thought Sally.

For the want of anything better to do, she decided to follow the peculiarly dressed goldfish. Perhaps it could tell him the way out of the forest.

Eventually, Sally reached a clearing. She found herself surrounded by houses made from different sorts of food. There was a house made from sweet potatoes, a house made from cupcakes, a house made from humbugs, a house made from doughnuts, a house made from chips and a house made from muffins.

Sally could feel her tummy rumbling. Looking at the houses did nothing to ease her hunger.

"Hello!" she called. "Is anybody there?"

Nobody replied.

Sally looked at the roof on the closest house and wondered if it would be rude to eat somebody else's chimney. Obviously it would be impolite to eat a whole house, but perhaps it would be considered acceptable to nibble the odd fixture or lick the odd fitting, in a time of need.

A cackle broke through the air, giving Sally a fright. A witch jumped into the space in front of the houses. She was carrying a cage. In that cage was Little Mouse!

"Little Mouse!" shouted Sally. She turned to the witch. "That's my toy!"

The witch just shrugged.

"Give Little Mouse back!" cried Sally.

"Not on your nelly!" said the witch.

"At least let Little Mouse out of that cage!"

Before she could reply, five spotted goldfishes rushed in from a footpath on the other side of the clearing. Sally recognised the one in the purple jumper that she'd seen earlier. The witch seemed to recognise him too.

"Hello Big Goldfish," said the witch.

"Good morning." The goldfish noticed Little Mouse. "Who is this?"

"That's Little Mouse," explained the witch.

"Ooh! Little Mouse would look lovely in my house. Give it to me!" demanded the goldfish.

The witch shook her head. "Little Mouse is staying with me."

"Um... Excuse me..." Sally interrupted. "Little Mouse lives with me! And not in a cage!"

Big Goldfish ignored her. "Is there nothing you'll trade?" he asked the witch.

The witch thought for a moment, then said, "I do like to be entertained. I'll release him to anybody who can eat a whole front door."

Big Goldfish looked at the house made from muffins and said, "No problem, I could eat an entire house made from muffins if I wanted to."

"That's nothing," said the next goldfish. "I could eat two houses."

"There's no need to show off," said the witch. Just eat one front door and I'll let you have Little Mouse."

Sally watched, feeling very worried. She didn't want the witch to give Little Mouse to Big Goldfish. She didn't think Little Mouse would like living with a spotted goldfish, away from her house and all her other toys.

The other four goldfishes watched while Big Goldfish put on his bib and withdrew a knife and fork from his pocket.

"I'll eat this whole house," said Big Goldfish. "Just you watch!"

Big Goldfish pulled off a corner of the front door of the house made from cupcakes. He gulped it down smiling, and went back for more.

   And more.

      And more.

Eventually, Big Goldfish started to get bigger - just a little bit bigger at first. But after a few more fork-fulls of cupcakes, he grew to the size of a large snowball - and he was every bit as round.

"Erm... I don't feel too good," said Big Goldfish.

Suddenly, he started to roll. He'd grown so round that he could no longer balance!

"Help!" he cried, as he rolled off down a slope into the forest.

Big Goldfish never finished eating the front door made from cupcakes and Little Mouse remained trapped in the witch's cage.

Average Goldfish stepped up, and approached the house made from humbugs.

"I'll eat this whole house," said Average Goldfish. "Just you watch!"

Average Goldfish pulled off a corner of the front door of the house made from humbugs. She gulped it down smiling, and went back for more.

   And more.

      And more.

After a while, Average Goldfish started to look a little queasy. She grew greener...

   ...and greener.

A woodcutter walked into the clearing. "What's this bush doing here?" he asked.

"I'm not a bush, I'm a goldfish!" said Average Goldfish.

"It talks!" exclaimed the woodcutter. "Those talking bushes are the worst kind. I'd better take it away before somebody gets hurt."

"No! Wait!" cried Average Goldfish, as the woodcutter picked her up. But the woodcutter ignored her cries and carried the goldfish away under his arm.

Average Goldfish never finished eating the front door made from humbugs and Little Mouse remained trapped in the witch's cage.

Little Goldfish stepped up, and approached the house made from doughnuts.

"I'll eat this whole house," said Little Goldfish. "Just you watch!"

Little Goldfish pulled off a corner of the front door of the house made from doughnuts. He gulped it down smiling, and went back for more.

   And more.

      And more.

After five or six platefuls, Little Goldfish started to fidget uncomfortably on the spot.

He stopped eating doughnuts for a moment, then grabbed another forkful.

But before he could eat it, there came an almighty roar. A bottom burp louder than a rocket taking off, propelled Little Goldfish into the sky.

"Aggghhhhhh!" cried Little Goldfish. "I'm scared of heigh..."

Little Goldfish was never seen again.

Little Goldfish never finished eating the front door made from doughnuts and Little Mouse remained trapped in the witch's cage.

Tiny Goldfish stepped up, and approached the house made from chips.

"I'll eat this whole house," said Tiny Goldfish. "Just you watch!"

Tiny Goldfish pulled off a corner of the front door of the house made from chips. She gulped it down smiling, and went back for more.

   And more.

      And more.

However, on the next mouthful, the food fell straight out of Tiny Goldfish's mouth. She tried to stuff in another forkful of chips, but once again, the food fell out. There just wasn't enough room left in her belly.

"This is just not fair!" declared Tiny Goldfish, and stomped off into the forest.

Tiny Goldfish never finished eating the front door made from chips and Little Mouse remained trapped in the witch's cage.

Even-Tinier Goldfish stepped up, and approached the house made from muffins.

"I'll eat this whole house," said Even-Tinier Goldfish. "Just you watch!"

Even-Tinier Goldfish pulled off a corner of the front door of the house made from muffins. He gulped it down smiling, and went back for more.

   And more.

      And more.

Suddenly, Even-Tinier Goldfish stopped eating and started dancing. While he danced, he sang at the top of his lungs, "Muffins! Watch me eat all the muffins!"

"It looks as though the muffins are making you hyperactive," laughed the witch.

"Oh no they're not!" cried Even-Tinier Goldfish. "I'm always this excited." With that, he walked into a tree.

Bong!

Even-Tinier Goldfish banged his head and fell backwards onto his bottom. He passed out, exhausted.

Even-Tinier Goldfish never finished eating the front door made from muffins and Little Mouse remained trapped in the witch's cage.

"That's it," said the witch. "I win. I get to keep Little Mouse."

"Not so fast," said Sally. "There is still one front door to go. The front door of the house made from sweet potatoes. And I haven't had a turn yet.

"I don't have to give you a turn!" laughed the witch. "My game. My rules."

The woodcutter's voice carried through the forest. "I think you should give her a chance. It's only fair."

"Fine," said the witch. "But you saw what happened to the goldfishes. She won't last long."

"I'll be right back," said Sally.

"What?" said the witch. "Where's your sense of impatience? I thought you wanted Little Mouse back."

Sally ignored the witch and gathered a hefty pile of sticks. She came back to the clearing and started a small camp fire. Carefully, she broke off a piece of the door of the house made from sweet potatoes and toasted it over the fire. Once it had cooked and cooled just a little, she took a bite. She quickly devoured the whole piece.

Sally sat down on a nearby log.

"You fail!" cackled the witch. "You were supposed to eat the whole door."

"I haven't finished," explained Sally. "I am just waiting for my food to go down."

When Sally's food had digested, she broke off another piece of the door made from sweet potatoes. Once more, she toasted her food over the fire and waited for it to cool just a little. She ate it at a leisurely pace then waited for it to digest.

Eventually, after several sittings, Sally was down to the final piece of the door made from sweet potatoes. Carefully, she toasted it and allowed it to cool just a little. She finished her final course. Sally had eaten the entire front door of the house made from sweet potatoes.

The witch stamped her foot angrily. "You must have tricked me!" she said. "I don't reward cheating!"

"I don't think so!" said a voice. It was the woodcutter. He walked back into the clearing, carrying his axe. "This little girl won fair and square. Now hand over Little Mouse or I will chop your broomstick in half."

The witch looked horrified. She grabbed her broomstick and placed it behind her. Then, huffing, she opened the door of the cage.

Sally hurried over and grabbed Little Mouse, checking that her favourite toy was all right. Fortunately, Little Mouse was unharmed.

Sally thanked the woodcutter, grabbed a quick souvenir, and hurried on to meet Clarke. It was starting to get dark.

When Sally got to Clarke's house, her threw his arms around her.

"I was so worried!" cried Clarke. "You are very late."

As Sally described her day, she could tell that Clarke didn't believe her. So she grabbed a napkin from her pocket.

"What's that?" asked Clarke.

Sally unwrapped a doorknob made from cupcakes. "Pudding!" she said.

Clarke almost fell off his chair.

The End